| time stands still, so do i. |
[Dec. 21st, 2005|04:19 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  blah | ] |
| [ | music |
| | ohio is for lovers - hawthorne heights | ] |
well, today i leave for sarnia.. much fun.. i get to miss thursday and friday of school. then yeah.. the rest of the holidays .. i dont really want to go.. only cause i hate the car ride up there. yeah.. i cried at school yesterday because this is yet again another christmas not spent with my mother. it just pisses me off that she would rather do other things than spend christmas day with her kids. but meh. thats just me. before, i was too young to begin to
understand. then when i hit my pre-teen days, it finally hit me. my mom didnt want to spend christmas with us.. well.. that killed me.. im sure my mother didnt mind ; sigh ; .. yeah. i wanted to spend christmas with her but she has to work. then she goes partying.. good god. oh well. christmas at my grandmas for the 14th year in a row shouldnt be that bad. i have friends down there.. they can be anoying as all hell. but they're my friends nonetheless and i love 'em. =].. we did the beep test today, i didnt do as well as i did last time, but on my fitness test with the flexibility and other things. i did pretty well. i did 16 push ups, thats better than what i got last time, i got 5.. yah..heh.. im horible with things like that.. i hate gym.. it sucks major ass. but i shall be going for now. i shall write again soon. probably tomorrow. untill then.
Love,
chels. x.o.x |
|
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| And Will You Tell All Your Friends, You Got Your Gun To My Head? |
[Sep. 14th, 2005|06:35 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  DAMN COLD VIRUS | ] |
Wow, Its Been a While. Like.Wow.Im so bored. haha I forgot my LJ password and yeah. I figured it out Woot.Jumps for JOY yeah. So it is my first few weeks of being a "Minor Niner" It isnt that bad since I know most of the grade 10's and 11's and a few 12's.. Yeah. I might hang out with Sarah on friday or something if my cold is gone away. GO WHITE BLOOD CELLS! yeah. uhm. Anywho, yeah I wanna go see FFAF at call the office, they rock my socks.Yeah. Uhm there isnt much to write right now but i will write later?OOKAY?! lol
Chelsea. |
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| Drowing In My Sleep |
[Jul. 23rd, 2005|01:11 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | Whats Lethargic? | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Alone in December -Underoath | ] |
I havent Updated In a while.
So.
Yeah, Im in Sarnia untill tomorrow.
Sunday.
I've been Listening to alot of cool new bands.
Silverstein.
Theyre Cool I like Them ALOT.
Thursday.
Theyre Good Too I like them.
UnEARTH is Good too.
BLAH..
On Tuesday Im Going On a Mall Date With My Friend Dylan. ^.*
Its HAWT!!
LoL We Planned it out So.
Yeah.
Its AmaZing, Im talking to my friend Benjamin.
Hes French.
Im being very RANDOM Today. FAIRY GOD PARENTS *Cough*
Inside Joke.
Its One of those You-had-to-be-there-to-understand-it jokes.
My cousin is listening to BEP.
On His Cella-mo-phone Thats not a word but meh.
My Friend Lynn.
Might be coming up to London(Lives in Waterloo)
And We Eat Aeros.
Another Inside Joke, Involved With Fairies. ^.*
But For Now.
I Bid all of You Adieu.
<3 EMO HARTZ <3
Chelsea. |
|
|
| To My Father |
[Jun. 30th, 2005|02:16 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  confused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Your Sweet 666 -HIM | ] |
This is A Poem To My Father, I hope That He Understands My Pain Someday
You Left Me There, Blinded, Deaf, Stunned.
Have You Already Had Your Fun?
You Ruined My Life.
It Hurt Me Real Bad, Cut Me Up Like A Knife.
Why Did You, How Could You?
You Scarred Me And Made Me Bleed,
You Were Just Living Behind You Fucking Greed.
Why Did you, How Could You?
You Left Me There, Helpless and Scared
You Wouldnt Of Left If You Really Cared.
I Cant Reach You To Tell You How I Feel,
Because You Couldnt Make Me Forget The Real,
You Cant Change Anything, Or Turn Back Time.
Please, Tell Me That You're Sorry, Just Onetime,
I Could Possibly Let You In.
Untill Then, You Can Stay Out In The Cold And Rain.
And Watch The Tears Stream Down My Twisted Face, In Pain.
Why Did You, How Could You? |
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|
| Blah...............Blah..................Blah............. |
[Jun. 18th, 2005|01:15 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | About life. | ] |
| [ | music |
| | The Big Sleep-Streetlight Manifesto | ] |
Well, I am into the MOST awesomest music EVER, its SKA MUSIC.. I think its the SHIZNACK!! wow. Im terribly tired.. I had a gut-wrenching cry last night over nothing.. Im bored.. Tired, Sad, Morbid, and whatnot.. Well i am going to go.. I'll update later if anything comes up..
Chelsea. <3333
P.S Meagan is coming to my grad!!! Im soo Happy!! |
|
|
| Sweet Six Six Six |
[May. 31st, 2005|07:18 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | With a Cold | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Sweet Six Six Six -HIM | ] |
UPDATION lmao.. Well I have nothing to write about.. lmao.. Well that just sucks.. im writing a story half true half not about my life.. lmao..its with me and my 3 best friends(one of my best friends happens to be my boyfriend.. lol What a plot twist!!) lmao.. Im retarted.. well 28 Days till I graduate!! I think.. YAY!!!! School Has gone by soo effin fast.. I just hope the summer will too.. So i can get back to London.. :) Well thats it for now..
<3 You All My Mages and Puppets and Muses..
Chelsea
P.S I have a Cold. So will Someone please ask me to get well or something?? That would be greatly Appreaciated. lol.. LOVE YOU ALL. |
|
|
| You Give Love A Bad Name. |
[May. 13th, 2005|04:23 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  mellow | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Lip Gloss and Black - Atreyu | ] |
WOW I havent updated in FOREVER anyways, My life has been better so far. I have a boyfriend now.. *smiles* lol.
I almost got suspended because I almost punched some kid in the face but someone broke us up. I was pissed crying and shaking.. Because he said I was poor and that I was ugly and a whore.. For a split second I believed him.. I wanted to crawl into a hole and stay there for the rest of my days. but then I realized I had better things to do than thing of what that asshole had to say to me.. But I still believed him... Life goes on.. You make new friends and lose old ones.. But no matter what.. There will always be 1 or 2 people who love and care about you deeply..
For Now,
Chelsea |
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| Great Memories, With Great Friends </u> |
[Apr. 9th, 2005|02:03 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  awake | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Blur- Woo hoo | ] |
Okay, I went to the Friday Nighter last night, it was soo great.. I Saw Jonny There and we Did The Spider Dance, People Of Last Year You Should Know What It was, I dont know why im putting capitals on everything.. Lol anyways.. I saw Shaina and Jackie(but I didnt recognize her, Sorry Jackie!!! I love You Still!!) there.. and Sarah and Meagan were there.. but I didnt see them.. I was dancing like a maniac like jumping up and down and everything and head banging MAJORLY! haha.. anyways.. I saw some old friends there.. Saw people I hated.. Me and Sarah Are talking on msn.. and we're planning what we're doing next weekend.. We're going to see Sin City with Meagan.. i think.. lol.. well anyways Im going.. I bid you all Adieu!! MUAH MUAH
Chels<3! |
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| I'll Show You Mine, If You Show Me Yours First. |
[Apr. 5th, 2005|04:18 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | blah | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Rumorsof MyDemise Have Been Greatly exaggerated-Rise Against | ] |
Well,
Today was Unbelieveably boring
Did nothing.. Actually, No did nothing.
Just sitting here, on my numb ass
Listening to Rise against.
Talking to Russell, because he is my good
Companion,Ow.. Im bleeding..
Oh well, I'll let the blood run down my chin
And onto my shirt.. oh shit.. not my shirt..
Anyways.. I got my pants signed today..
And Mitch Mcguffin wrote "fuck" In big letters
On them.. haha.. fuck.. such a funny word.
Im bored.. I want friends!! *laugh.* I have friends.
Im going to a party.. and I might get to see my boyfriend..
If my friends roomate wants to drive down to Sarnia
And pick him up.. and we'll spend the night there(at friends)..
Then like drive him home the next day.. Sunday (weekend thing).
Sounds like a plan GODAMMIT!! Lol.. Im going psycho for reasons
I cant say.. well Im out..
Adieu!!
<3 Chelsea. |
|
|
| Mixed Emotions and Confuzed Lives. |
[Apr. 1st, 2005|03:22 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | depressed | ] |
Well, yesterday, My step dad came into my room and started yelling at me, I got grounded because of my brothers stupid mistake, he got grounded too but thats not the point. He was yelling on about if we cant come up with 6000$ in 6 days, then we have to move out, We have absolutely nowhere to go, the only place is my grandmothers.It's not that I dont want to go there, I just dont want to leave my friends behind, there are a few people I could care less about, but thats not the point either, There are so many things I want to say, but, There are a select few I can trust, I havent slept for 3 days, Im so depressed, and tired, I want to scream.. I want to get away from it all. I dont know how, I want to kill myself, Just fall over and die. But, I know that theres no solution for this, I already know that we wont get enough money, So Im going to go home, after I go to the Library, and start packing. I'm going to go now and write at the library.
Fallen Dreams and Broken Hearts,
Chelsea |
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| I am a Butterfly, But you wouldnt Let me Die. |
[Mar. 29th, 2005|06:42 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | confused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | I Woke Up In A Car -Something Corporate | ] |
Well, Today at school.. I got called a "fucking fat whore".. yeah.. Well, I guess half of it is true. My parents got into a fight all yesterday and all Saturday, I wanted to run away, I wanted to tell them to shut the fuck up coz I hated them so much and at that point,I was ready to pack my bags and leave, but i had no where to go, I'd be running around like a lost puppy, but im out for now, Write yah lata..
Chels. |
|
|
| Somethings Very Wrong Here, Your Heart is Frozen Over. |
[Mar. 26th, 2005|07:31 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | silly | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Reiventing your Exit -Underoath | ] |
WAHEY!!! lmao.. Im talking to my cousin on msn.. haha.. shes so cool.. Im so bored.. me and my b/f had this 4 hour conversation... Then his phone died =( it sucked soo bad. I went to bed tho so, I was so tired, lol. I still am, Would anyone like to come to the mall with me today? I have nothing else to do and Im bored as fuck, and I need something to do, I dont know if Im going with Ash yet or not.. but We'll see I guess... Im so tired. But Im going to go for now, Email me if you would like to do something today chelseabun9@hotmail.com or Telephone me. 432-3554.. haha... lol
<3 You all!!! Muah
Chels |
|
|
| Im Falling Even More In Love With You. |
[Mar. 24th, 2005|07:53 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | depressed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Hanging by a Moment -Lifehouse | ] |
Well,
I just had a HUGENORMUS fucking fight with my ex-boyfriend.. Then he said that I failed at life and I had nothing to live for.. I may not show alot of Emotion.. but that fucking hurt me.. I swear.. I want to cut off his Dick and make him eat it I mean, I want to hurt him so bad.. I want to make him feel how I feel, I have all these bottled up emotions inside of me, and I have no clue what to do with them, sometimes, I burst out into tears, sometimes I cut myself, sometimes I dont do anything. But I dont know what to do.. I want to run far away and start my life over, I want to scream, yell for help, cry on someones shoulder, I want to be with The Guy I Love.. but, I dont know how to get there. I dont know what to do. I miss the way everything used to be, where I didnt have to worry about anything except how I was getting to school and what I was going to wear.. I feel like I've fallen to pieces and that the pieces are so small that I cant put them back together, and I feel like my Heart has Shattered into one million pieces, but there is someone who is putting those pieces back together, I thank him one million times over and over, plus, I have this huge cold.. plus I have a sore throat and I feel like crap. but I think Im going to go for now.. I'll update again before I get off.
tootles <3
Chels. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Mar. 23rd, 2005|04:30 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | what does apathetic mean? | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Swing Swing- All American Rejects | ] |
I can't erase you from my past
i cant delete you from my mind
all i can do is say goodbye
i cant pretend you were never here
i cant fake like it didnt hurt when you disappeard
i refuse to use a fake old grin
but than again i'll never win...
i cant pretend that i dont care
i cant pretend that you are near
so i guess ill just pretend to say goodbye...
AWW thats soo cute.. I love it, It means alot.. |
|
|
| And Each Piece of Me Dies, And Only You Can Give The Breath Of Life. |
[Mar. 23rd, 2005|03:40 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  bouncy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Reinventing your exit -UnderOath | ] |
Hey,
School was Fun today, I talked to Jordan
He's the New Guy.
He's so cool and Hes so Cute, Laugh Out Loud
But Alas, I my heart
Belongs to the only one I love, Chev. I love Him
I dont know why Im writing like this.
Im Listening to Finch, New beginnings..
Tre Tre cool..
Meagan I cant wait till we have Hot Oily sex
No One saw That.*rolls the eyes*
I fail at writing this.. Like this.. I failed at that Sentence.
*this is the way I would have done things
Up against the wall, up against the wall
You got me up against your wall*
^^^^^ Amazing song^^^^^
Tootles for now <3!
Bye. |
|
|
| .So long and Goodnight.. |
[Mar. 22nd, 2005|03:46 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | lazy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Swing Life Away-Rise Against | ] |
Well im depressed as fuck Happy.. lol.. Im doing better, but I found out that my grandpa has a blood clot in his brain.. and that he is at a high risk of dieing.. Im still scared but yeah. its all good. lol..
Lol.. CHEV TOLD ME HE LOVED ME!!! well I dont Love him I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!! Haha... omg.. hes such a cutie..
Im not allowed to go to Sarnia to see Chev relatives, but I want to see my grandpa coz. Im so scared like.. I dont know what to do.. Meagan said she'd talk to me.. and I love Meagan so.. maybe she could come to my school and we could Have sex Hang out.. lmao.. well signing off.
<3! |
|
|
| So Scared It Hurts. |
[Mar. 19th, 2005|03:44 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  . . . I hope my Grandpa is Ok. | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Me and The Moon -Something corporate | ] |
Well.... Today has been... SHITTAY. My grandpa is in the hospital because there is a problem with his legs, I am so scared and I dont know what to do.. I want to cry, I want to scream.. There are all these emotions inside of me and I dont know what to do with them.. I want to run away, and go see Chev.. but my uncle would never let that.. Now my heart is doing flip-flops.. Im so afraid.. I want to be with Chev right now... I miss him alot.. I hope my grandpa is alright..Chev came to see me and my uncle came and I told him I had to go.. So he held me for a while and then Kissed me.. I was happy but.. it just wasnt enough. My Mom is completely obvlivious to the whole fact that my grandpa(her dad) is in the hospital.. I hope my uncle calls her to let her know. I am talking to Jessica.. my best friend, And Rae.. she is so comforting.. But.. I think Im in love..? I dont know what it is.. but everytime Im with Chev.. I cant stop shaking.. he makes me so happy.. I know it sounds stupid.. but I think I am actually in love.. Chev isnt like the other guys.. Hes really polite with an edge.. hes bad.. but at the same time.. he is amazingly sweet.. and he makes my heart race.. He goes outta his way just to come and hang out with me.just the way he hugs me.. and holds me.. Its amazing.. But.. Im scared. for my grandpa.. for me.. for everything. I've calmed down a little bit.. I hope I get to see Chev before I leave tomorrow.. I miss him.. well I will write later.. Adios..
<3,
Chels..
P.S. I hope someone will talk to me and help me thru this..
<3 |
|
|
| Jelousy Is Taking Over Me. |
[Mar. 17th, 2005|02:54 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | (Off Air.. and Chev) | ] |
Well... This poor-excuse-of-a-computer. is screwing up and there is no msn on it.. so i cant talk to anyone else.. and Msn2go isnt working because the fucking window is frozen, so alas.. I have to shut down and reboot after this entry.. Anyways.. Flash Back to last night...
I went to go get some stuff from the store, and I was supposed to "be right back"
But I saw my friends hot brother, so I hung out with Chev(yes his name is Chev.. He hot..)
Then we went to go get his sister Malibu.. but she had to clean her room, so we waited,
and waited, and waited.. Then Jessy, Alyssa and Amy came over. Yay..
Alyssa and Amys step mom got rushed to the Hospital coz they thought she was having a
heart attack..
Me and Chev got locked out of Amys house.. so we went to go get Tyler,we went to the
old Welfare school(High Park) and hung out there untill I had to go.
Chev and Tyler walked me home and we hung out in the middle of the cresent where my
grandma lives and we talked for like half an hour,
Then I told Chev I had to go.. so he's like "okay".. He gave me a hug..
Then He KISSED ME!!! WEWT!!! I was soo happy, it was a crappy kiss.. but atleast it was one.
SO Back to Today...
Chev and Tyler came over AGAIN... lol. and we Hung out on my drive way Re-inacting the scenes from the mall.
"chels remember this??" Chev spit on the ground and jumped over it imatating me.
"chev SHUT UP!! I thought she was gunna spit on me!!"
Then Chev doubled over laughing.. I wanted to kick him.. it was mean..
My brother locked me outta the house.. so i stayed outside longer..
He unlocked the door and i ran and got my shoes. We hung out on my front porch untill I had to
go inside.. then Again.. The scene from last night.. Hug.. Then a kiss.. we've known eachother for
like 3 days.. but yeah..
Haha.. An hour later.. I hear someone knock at the door..
"Who the hell is this??"
I look outside and its my buddies Ryan Adam and Ford. hehe.. theyre all cute..
then I told them I wasnt allowed outside because I was "grounded" HA! lmao.. my grandma has never grounded
me.. so yeah.. its a joke... wow.. then I get to see Chev tomorrow again.. He gave me a
spikey bracelet coz I wanted his big one he was like.. "No but you can have this one."..
I was like "SCORE!" then I made fun of Rex and some other kid.. it was all good.. but yeah.
That was my awesomeness weekend.. so far.. update tomorrow(if possible)
LOve You all!!!
<3!! Muahiez
Chels |
|
|
| Trust Me, Not The Butcher.. Haha.. Lol. That Failed. |
[Mar. 15th, 2005|07:09 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | Scarrry.. Ack! | ] |
Well,
ANYWAYS... TODAY WAS THE BEST DAY EVER!!! WeWt.. I went to the mall with my baby Malibu and her hot sexy brother Chev ( he is soooo effing hot) I love him.. lol.. he is such a cutie.. well anyways.. we went to the mall.. and yeah.. we walked around it like 8 times.. then found malibus friends.. then went to walk around with them, then we got Mc Donalds.. and Chevs lip ring fell out.. haha..and he couldnt pick it up.. GREASY FINGERS.. Haha.. lol. that failed.. anyways.. yeah that was my day.. Update later..
Love You Everyone!!!
<3 <3!!! Muah muah.. |
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Hehe..